Potatoes are the chicken of vegetables. You can fry, bake, boil, steam, grill, broil or eat them raw [ unlike chicken ]. You can slice, dice, chop, shred, waffle cut, mash or puree them. Put two or three good-sized potatoes in a sturdy bag and they make an effective weapon. A one pound potato in a well made Potato Gun can be shot a hundred yards and knock a grown man off his feet. How many forms of food can be used for personal defence and then made into a tasty casserole?

Potato soup is effective for alleviating the aches and pains of the common cold, flu, general cold – rainy – day miseries, griping of the guts, marthambles[?] , and the thousand natural shocks that flesh is heir to. I’ve seen it fed with great effect to a man on his deathbed; he died anyway, but at least he wasn’t hungry.

Here then is THE GREATEST POTATO SOUP ON EARTH, an infinitely adaptable recipe that everyone will find edible and can be salted, peppered, crackered, or laced with whatever sauce is on the table to suit the individual taste of your patrons.

1 BIG or 2 big potatoes
[ we might as well get this business about the Peel settled up front; to eat the peel or not? I personally prefer to use the peel as I’ve always been told that it contains vitamins and minerals that some people can become overly concerned with { you know, the ones who have to read the label before they will put spoon to bowl } I like the taste and I think it adds character to the soup, and soup without character is like a man without character, not worth knowing. But, there is no sense making something that no one wants to eat, so, use your own discretion ]
1 onion
1 garlic
1 stick celery
1 pc. bacon
1 32 oz. box chicken broth
1 10 oz.can cream of chkn. soup
1 Tbls. butter  [ no, you can’t use margarine; if you take milk from a cow, put it in a jar, shake it a while, you get butter. God knows where margarine comes from; they say corn, but I have planted, weeded, watered, hoed, picked, shucked, stripped, boiled,  baked, steamed, broiled, grilled, buttered and eaten corn all my life and never seen anything that resembles margarine come from it. Who knows what unholy things must be done to as simple a thing as corn to turn it into a substance more akin to grease than anything else. Once in Houston —– where was I ?]
1 Tbls. butter [ just one , not another one ]

Dice potato[s] and bacon, put in 3 qt. pan with 32 oz. ckn. broth, bring to boil, reduce heat and simmer covered for 25 to 30 min.
In covered pan, saute butter, onions, garlic and finely minced celery on medium to  low heat for ten to fifteen minutes or untill you’re happy with them; at the minimum the celery should be soft, not crunchy, or if you like it crunchy make it crunchy, who’s to know?

When done, remove half of the cubed potatoes from the pot, stir in the onions – garlic – celery and the cream of chicken soup, mash and mix it up untill all the parts are in complete agreement – you want harmony at the dinner table – when the soup has a creamy consistency, add the potatoes you removed earlier back into the mix. If the result is to thick add broth to thin.

Serves 10 to 20 depending on how big the bowls are and how hungry the people.