Goulash in C-major – or – Shovel That Coal

Some people eat the way a season ticket holder at the Opera listens to music. They will wade thru tons of horns, violins, and pounding kettle drums to hear the brief faint trill of a flute or piccolo hidden in the forest of weightier notes; like the rare glimpse of a bluejay flitting among the trees.

Others eat the way you would shovel coal into the roaring throat of a steam engine; style don’t matter just keep the fire going.

For either taste, I humbly submit this –THE GREATEST TEXAS GOULASH RECIPE ON EARTH — for your guaranteed delight and benefit.

1 lb. ground beef
1 pckg taco seasoning
2/3 c. water
2 slices bacon
1 Tbls salt
1 onion
1 Tbls butter
1 garlic
1 15 oz. can diced tomatoes
1 8 oz. can tomato sauce
1 12 oz.pckg large elbow macaroni

In a sauce pan [ 2 3 quarts? ] heat the butter, chop up the onion and garlic and cook uncovered – it will kill the cockroaches.
When the onions and garlic are done – the cockroaches are all belly up – put ground beef in on top of them – the onions and garlic, not the cockroaches and cook untill done – drain [ I have a cereal bowl that fits exactly into my pot – I use a pot holder under the pot and one in the cereal bowl – turn the pot upside down over the trash can and press the bowl untill all of the liquid is drained. You might want to do this outside as the cockroaches that aren’t dead yet will immediately vacate the trash can.]

While all this is going on, put three quarts of water and 1 Tbls of salt in another bigger pot – use a nice one as all of the ingredients eventually wind up here and you can serve the goulash from it – bring to a boil and add the macaroni to the boiling water – cook for 7 minutes – drain and put back in the pot –  the big one.

Back to the meat – put the drained meat-onions-garlic on the heat – add taco seasoning and 2/3 cup of water – bring to a boil, add 2 slices bacon diced, cover and simmer for ten minutes – or twenty minutes if you like.
Add diced tomatoes and sauce to the meat – stir untill mixed well.

Pour the meat-onion-garlic-bacon-tomato-sauce on the macaroni and mix thoroughly – let it sit for thirty minutes covered to find itself – then mix again.

Call the hogs – throw it on the table and jump back or you’ll get trampled in the stampede.

serves 1 – 10  depends on the people

Posted on April 23, 2012, in Recipes and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments.

  1. Sounds delicious! Think we will have to give it a try. I will skip the cockroach part though …:-)


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