[special report from Jake’s Post Super Collision Garage—Somewhere, Alabama;]
Scientists today announced the successful conclusion of a decades long search to find the ellusive “Dodge Particle”; the original building block of The Automobile, which they proclaim explains the existence of cars without the need to believe in the supernatural creator Henry Ford.
Working at the worlds biggest wrecking yard, conveniently built next to a demolition derby track, the team of experimenters ran a two-door 51 Plymouth and a 58 Chevy Bel-Air around the track untill the critical speed was reached, then directed them to a head-on collision resulting in the total annihilation of the two classic vehicles, reducing them to their elemental components. Lead scientist Elmore Bigg explained that in this act of creative destruction the basic building block of all cars was revealed to be an exotic form of matter that he has named — Bigg Iron.
” All the parts of the two colliding vehicles, from the smallest screw to the front and back fenders, are made of Bigg Iron, we have proved that conclusively” announced the exultant scientist.
The groups publicist, Letitia Knott, happily proclaimed; ” We can lay to rest the superstitious nonsense of Henry Ford with the discovery of Bigg Iron, the basic building block of all cars.”
The successful team of researchers plan to move quickly on their next project; flying two aircraft in a head-on collision. The scientists hope to demonstrate that the existence of airplanes can be explained without reference to the Wright Brothers. Time will tell if they are wrong or
wright – right.
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